Bottoms up for new potty-trained Hall of Decadence!
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A spokesman has confirmed that a new Hall of Residence is to be built at Rending Uni. The new hall, to be called Pampers Hall, will cater for those students who find it difficult to perform the usual house-trained tasks most take for granted. In the lingo
of the PC movement, the 'potty challenged'. The hall will offer assistance in performing simple tasks such as sitting the right way round on a lavatory, remembering not to urinate in the bath, and flushing the chain after defecation. Students will also b
e told that it is not regarded as social behaviour to strew lavatory paper around or wipe one's backside on the lavatory cubicle walls.
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Instructors will take the inmates step-by-step through the procedures involved in successfully negotiating the tricky process of going to the toilet partly in the classroom and partly in special mockup lavatories, the so-called 'lavatoys'. They hope that they can achieve a 100 percent success rate within two months. A spokesman for the Vice-Charmseller said: "we were a little surprised by the need for this new Hall because so much of what it will do is already being covered by Brudges Hall". |
